jyla grace

On this day

7 months ago

we were flying home from China-to the USA! 

We were bringing home our very little Jyla girl.

Scott, myself, my mom, Addalie & I had all survived the journey

& for the most part had thoroughly enjoyed the adventure. 

So much has happened since then. Life has been intense.

More often than not, I can't find the words to express things...

sometimes I have tried & stumbled through communicating-

but most times I have just tried to give honest, simple answers when people ask about how we are doing. I haven't journaled at all since then. (except for in Jyla's life book & on this blog)

#1 I haven't had the time &
#2 there have been days & nights that have just been too hard for me to want to remember them.
I don't necessary want to remember "those" days...
I want to remember God's faithfulness to us instead....
& believe me...
that will always be very clear to me when I think about our transition in bringing Jyla home.
As I sit down to write this blog entry...
I think that it may bore some of you.
but I want to document things a bit.
I had intended to write at 6 months...but things were still so hard then..(only 1 month ago)
& I couldn't bring myself to sit down & do it.
Life now, 7 months later, is settleing maybe just a little bit.
I know that Jyla loves us all.
She has a very sweet demeanor towards Scott & I.
If I ask her to do something....even if she doesn't want to-she respects our authority.
She is extremely intelligent & very articulate for her age.
When she draws on a piece of paper she doesn't scribble like most 2 yr. olds..instead she will draw tiny little circles & lines. very detailed.
She is very very coordinated, balanced, strong, & graceful! (gymnastics or ballet perhaps?)

She LOVES dancing. 

Her dance moves crack me up because I KNOW that she didn't get them from either Scott or I

(or even Addalie). 

She also loves music!

Its interesting to me because looking back to the days when she was refusing me...I would often try to calm her or soothe her by singing to her.  But when I did that she would always scream 10x's louder...& say NO!  I wasn't convinced that she didn't like music & my suspicions were confirmed that indeed she does LOVE music...She just didn't want me to be able to settle her in those times...therefore she desperately didn't want me to sing to her.  But now, her favorite songs are "My God is so big" (with the motions of course) & Jesus Loves Me.  (& "Hop-hop-hippity".  but we've officially worn the CD out...Addalie & Jyla are sad...I on the other hand haven't missed it)

Her English is taking off.  I cannot believe how much she is talking.  Starting to say sentences. 

She really doesn't miss a thing & the more she talks the more I realize that. 

She is very very VERY competitive & always trying to protect herself. 

She is maddened if Addalie takes anything from her (what child isn't....)

It is evident that she is use to taking care of herself. 

Lately if she falls (& nobody touched her or pushed her) she will say, "Mommy, NO push!". 

I have to tell her that I didn't push...she just fell.  =)

She is finally on the charts for weight & height.

1% & 2% respectively.

She just saw Dr. Tift last week.

He is very happy with her growth.

She gained 8 pounds in the first 3 months that she was with us.

Eating is not quite as crazy or intense as it was. 

She still won't eat fruits

(she will eat bananas if we're lucky...& she took 1 serving of applesauce last week.  I was SO EXCITED!  but nothing since.)

As far as vegetables go its peas, corn & sweet potatoes but that's it. 

She loves meats, cheese, breads & pastas. & SWEETS.

SHE IS SO SOCIAL.  She is devastated if anybody goes away & she can't go along. 

She is a totally different little girl when we are out & about or at other peoples house! 

Much less clingy...Much more engaged. 

It's amazing & nobody really believes me when I tell them what our days are like at home. 

Night times continue to be one of our hardest parts.  I still sleep on a mattress in her room for a good portion of the night.  It makes getting up before her interesting & pretty much impossible. 

But she's come a long way since September in this area.  For months 1 of us would sit in her room & read on the rocking chair while we waited for her to fall asleep (for about an hr. at naps/bedtime) & then we would sneak out....

But lately she's been going to sleep by herself!  This in itself is a huge blessing.  So much of my time was spent sitting there waiting for her to sleep.  Her naps are getting longer.  Another blessing!  Night times are random & usually if Scott is getting up w/her she somehow knows that & only wakes up a few times...If I'm on duty....it's 5-8+ times. =)

Jyla loves Addalie.  Basically ;) 

Even though Jyla is VERY affectionate with Scott & I she often can't handle Addalie's strong affections.  Sharing, jealousy, & hitting/scracthing/pushing are issues about every 15 minutes! 

Our Social Worker recommended that we receive some post-adoption counseling due to some of the things that are going on...so last week I met w/that counselor.  It was so encouraging to me as I was able to bounce things off of her & not get a blank stare in return!  They are offering us some respite services. 

Over all I have learned so much in the past 7 months.  I know that every child is different.  Children cannot be & should never be compared.  Even as I look into the lives of other families that adopted from China around the same time that we did (mostly through blogs) I have to guard against comparing when things look so differently.  We know that God Sovereignly put Jyla with us.  & we LOVE her!  In the past month my heart has been especially enlarged for my daughter! 

I am realizing that attachment takes T I M E- even for myself. 

I am realizing that their are very specific reasons that Jyla responds to things the way that she does.  Specifically because the first 8 months of her life were spent in an orphanage & while we will never know what the conditions were like there...we have clues..& we put pieces of that puzzle together ....& from that I don't think it was a very ideal place.  The kind of care that a child receives in the first 8-10 months severely affects their emotional & physically development.  I am amazed at how God created us and when I see Jyla's sensory issues or her emotional issues...

I realize that I need to be patient with her & that things could be SO MUCH WORSE! 

God spared her little life. 

She is feisty!! 

She is S W E E T!!!! 

She is B E A U T I F U L!

Her skin is so soft...so perfect...her hair is any girls dream.

The texture of it holds & will do anything its told to do.

All that to say...

I LOVE HER.

I've loved her every since I saw her referral picture.

But every day my love for her unfolds even more & goes even deeper.

The way that she looks deep into my eyes when she asks me a question...

the way she wraps herself around my legs...

the way she sleeps on top of my stomach...

the way she runs after Addalie in the green lawn...

the way she says "I want daddy" when she's barely awake in the morning...

The MOST adorable little high-pitched giggle ever!!

The serious look she gets on her face when she sings...or prays...

the way that she says she is thankful for "grandma & cookies" every single night when we pray at bedtime.

It feels like she's been with us for a much longer time than 7 months.

God has used her to strengthen my patience, to show me my selfishness, to teach me HIS sustenance & that HE will give me exactly what I need for each day.

I look forward to the rest of this first year with Jyla as we make many memories with her this summer.

Above all, I am so completely thankful to God for this little blessing.

I am thankful for the way that had has preserved her, protected her, & brought our lives together.

I am thankful for the way HE has & is equipping us each day.